Do You Call Yourself "Victim" ? By Denise Brown

Denise on October 20th, 2010

On Good Morning America yesterday, Maria Shriver shared the stories of family caregivers of persons with Alzheimer’s. During the segment, Maria said: Family caregivers are victims, too.
I worry when we throw out terms like “victims” and apply them to family caregivers. A victim, in my mind, is powerless in a situation or circumstance. Once you give up your power, you’ve given up.
That’s not to say that a disease, like Alzheimer’s, that causes a caregiving situation isn’t horrible and dreadful. It is. It’s had a horrible impact on your life. It’s a dreadful situation to face every day.
But, if you’re a victim, then you wake up every day defeated. You say, I don’t think I can even try.
When you’re the anti-victim, you wake up and say: I’m going to try my best to be at my best so I can make the best of today.
This is my perspective, though. I’d love to hear yours. Please tell us in our comments section: Do you call yourself “victim”?

http://www.caregiving.com/

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The Caregiving Years by Denise Brown

Buy The Caregiving Years, by Denise Brown of caregiving.com, and follow two family caregivers through the six stages.

http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/the-caregiving-years-six-stages-to-a-meaningful-journey/4295503

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Welcome to Caregivers Not Alone!

There are countless caregivers who are isolated, alone, cut off from outside activities, and often from family and friends, caregivers who are not able to even attend support groups.


Many caregivers do not own a computer where they could at least find support groups on the internet. They are in need of someone that will take the time to pay them a visit, give them the chance to talk about the caregiving journey that they are on.


For the past 4 years, I have been a full time caregiver for my mother. Mom is in the last stages of dementia and requires total care. My main source of support and help these years has been from my husband, without him I could not have done this.


I have been one of those isolated caregivers, finding support through caregiver websites only. I would have been so glad to have had someone who would come to my home just to sit and talk with me, and offer support.

Caregiving is a give and give situation. In the case of a parent, they in most instances, are the one who took care of us as we began our lives and now, we give back by being their caregiver.


The act of giving can continue when we reach out to other caregivers in whatever capacity we can, to be a listener for them and encourage them on whichever caregiving path they find themselves.

Caregivers Not Alone